Change can be freeing…but takes courage

How much of our life do we spend trying to change the things that we have absolutely no control over? This can apply to people, situations or even unexpected events that happen in our lives. We spend so much time trying to change someone or something that ultimately we have no control to affect, that we often waste precious time in our own lives that we could use focusing on nurturing our own souls.

In reality, we have the ultimate control. If we are in a bad relationship we can get out. If we are in a bad work situation we can change jobs. If we are in a bad living arrangement we can move. However staying in those situations and trying to change the person, work or place to suit our needs usually only leads to a lot of wasted years of our own lives.

Does that mean that we just walk away from anything that makes us uncomfortable? Absolutely not. We do owe it to ourselves to work together to make situations and relationships better to determine if there is a chance for change. However, we all know that at some point the realization comes that change is impossible and it is those situations where we have to be honest with ourselves, know that we have exhausted our options and move on to a better life.

Years ago I was in a bad job situation. I had tried to change positions to another area of the company, tried different work hours and even tried counseling to try and figure out if I was the problem. Nothing seemed to work. How did I know I was in a no win situation? I was taking anxiety pills to go to work. I was taking sleeping pills to go to sleep at night. I did not want to go anywhere or do anything. The situation I was in was not going to change. I had only one choice to maintain my sanity and that was to leave and know that my ability to control the situation was gone. It was no longer the place for me and I left 15 years behind and started over. The best move I ever made in my career.

Letting go is not easy. We invest our time, energy, resources and love in people, places and things. They become a part of the fabric of who we are and tearing that fabric is no easy task. But sometimes it takes tearing that fabric completely to be able to put on a whole new garment to see just how good change can feel. It takes courage, perseverance and dedication, but it is possible. The moment you break free of that which is holding you back is the instant that life begins again. Oh what a beautiful life it can be.

Have a great day and remember to be the reason someone smiles today.


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