We were having dinner with friends last night and we were talking about how our lives have changed since we have moved from our 20’s into our 50’s. The things around us, people still in our lives and even the way we live. We were especially talking about people who used to be in our lives regularly who have for one reason or another faded away, often not through anything that happened, but simply as a natural course of the friendship. Tim said something that resonated with me that I found to be very profound. He said, “the older we get, the clearer our vision becomes”.

When we are younger and trying to find our way in the world, it is easier to be a part of the masses. We are growing, learning and trying out friendships in bulk to find those that click and those that will become peripheral acquaintances. Through the process of finding out who we are and what we are all about, we are open to a larger number of “friendships” as we tend to have more time, energy and desire to be a part of it all. As we age, that seems to change.

By the time we have gotten into our fifties we have started going through the “weeding the garden” phase and that core group of people who become a major part of our life starts to lessen in numbers. Some friendships naturally fade away. Some may have seemed to have been a major part of your life, but circumstances happen, either manufactured or by chance, that prove that the foundation for a lasting friendship just was not there for one reason or another. Finally, as the numbers start to wain, you are left with the core that are likely to be those that you continue to travel with for the rest of your life.

As I told my friends last night, I do not believe for one second that we become a group of people that travel life together by chance. The reason that we are together is because we were meant to be. Twenty, thirty, forty and fifty year friendships don’t just happen. They result in the work and dedication that each side puts into the friendship to nourish it, make it healthy and keep it going. Time may separate you, but you always find your way back together because that is what was meant to happen.

Those friends who remain in that life circle are not just friends, they become an intimate part of your family. We celebrate the highs and lows of each other’s lives and we do it willingly, not because we have to. When we have friendships like that we have a responsibility to cherish and nurture them. They are one of the true blessings of life.

Have a great day and remember to be the reason someone smiles today.

Ron

Mornings with Ron is available as a podcast at anchor.fm/morningswithron or on iHeartRadio, Apple or Google Podcast, Spotify or most podcast sites.